Zoom!
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It was a warm summer morning in February, and President Zoom woke up with a bad case of the Zooms. “Zoom, zoom!” said President Zoom! “Zoom, zoom, zoom!”
Zoom zoom zoom!
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“Oh no,” said President Zoom’s advisors! “Oh no!” said President Zoom’s political rivals! “Oh no,” said the American public! “President Zoom has a bad case of the Zooms!” “Zoom, zoom, zoom!” President Zoom agreed!
Zoom!
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“I know just what to do,” said Doctor Bornstein! “I know just what to do to get rid of these zooms, President Zoom!”
Zoom!
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“Zoom zoom zoom?” asked President Zoom.
“Exactly!” shouted Doctor Bornstein! “This case of the zooms will require some VROOMS! The roomiest, doomiest, boomiest vrooms! A plane that makes vrooms is the cure for the zooms!”
Zoom!
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“This is not a Doctor Seuss thing, so please stop talking like that.” said the President’s advisors. “Zoom, zoom, zoom,” agreed President Zoom! Then they flew on Air Force One to the Daytona 500.
“Vroom, vroom, vroom!” said the plane! “Zoom, zoom, zoom!” said President Zoom! “It’s one of the most incredible things I’ve ever seen—they say that plane is 800 feet above the racetrack right now—what a great entrance by the President of the United States!” said a color commentator who had never seen an airplane before.
Zoom-a-zoom zoom!
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The plane hit the ground with a thunderous boom. But President Zoom found he still had the zooms! “Zoom zoom,” said the president! “Zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom! Zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom!”
“Zoom zoom zoom!” said President Zoom’s car! “Zoom zoom zoom!” said President Zoom! “Zoom zoom zoom!” said President Zoom’s supporters! “All I wanna do is zoom-a-zoom-zoom-zoom!” said Wreckx-N-Effect! “Zoom, zoom, zoom!” said one of President Zoom’s General Atomics MQ-9 Reaper Drones as it unleashed an AGM-114R Hellfire II on a bunch of agricultural workers!
Zoom!
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Zoom zoom zoom!
Zoom!
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Zoom zoom zoom!
Zoom!
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Zoom zoom zoom!
Zoom!
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Zoom zoom zoom!
Zoom!
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It was another wonderful day for President Zoom!
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